...He could have used the gumball to restrain her. He didn't have to lead her away.
[how very unfair of itsuki to say, but he won't lie that it's been on his mind.]
He didn't have to be kind to her -- in the end. ...And he didn't have to be kind to us.
[that feels like the biggest kicker. he doesn't know how pants thinks of it, but he wonders if she's the same as him. thinking whether or not they actually deserve Buzen's kindness,]
[Every time she tried to rebuff him, or tell him they weren't friends, or she didn't need him, and every time, he insisted, he set himself forward, he helped, he was there, when she needed him the most. For what? What did she give in return?]
[She's biting back on the emotion welling inside, but its hard, it really is.]
He loved with every inch of his being. That's just who he was. How could...he be like that? No matter what...? No matter what he'd been through?
me tears in my eyes: yes get dana, and also me bc im reading this
[Itsuki wants to know the answer to Hot Pants' question too. What made him so bright? What made him live so strongly? Was it because he was a sword from a myth that may have never existed? Did he live with all his heart in spite of that?]
The stronger you feel, the more alive you are, right?
[maybe that's the answer, maybe it's not. Itsuki's aware of how little he knows about Buzen, at the end of the day. Even with his feelings for him, he can't claim to know his mind. And that fct hurts.]
If he can leave even the smallest impact behind wherever he goes... Then that's proof of his existence.
[The smallest impact...yes. It almost feels like that, but at the same time, so little turned into so much. He was only here briefly, and yet he made a world of a difference.]
[She's shuddering, drawing closer.]
He deserved...more time. He deserved all the time in the world. I don't care what he said. It's not fair, Itsuki. It's not fair at all.
[Itsuki holds her close, this is as much to comfort him as it is to her. It helps, even if it doesn't stop his eyes from filling,
it's just so sad. that buzen isn't here, and that Hot Pants, someone whose strength he's seen so many times, is crumbling for the sake of another. If Buzen was, then he'd know what to say.
But maybe that's also the problem -- that Buzen always knows what to say, and now they're left bereft without him.]
Yeah. [he puts all his agreement in that single word,] I wish he was still here -- with us, and not just as a thought in our heads. It's hard to yell at someone in your head, yeah?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
together we will destroy her
[how very unfair of itsuki to say, but he won't lie that it's been on his mind.]
He didn't have to be kind to her -- in the end. ...And he didn't have to be kind to us.
[that feels like the biggest kicker. he doesn't know how pants thinks of it, but he wonders if she's the same as him. thinking whether or not they actually deserve Buzen's kindness,]
me prepping my glock
[And yet. And yet.............]
But he did.
[Every time she tried to rebuff him, or tell him they weren't friends, or she didn't need him, and every time, he insisted, he set himself forward, he helped, he was there, when she needed him the most. For what? What did she give in return?]
[She's biting back on the emotion welling inside, but its hard, it really is.]
He loved with every inch of his being. That's just who he was. How could...he be like that? No matter what...? No matter what he'd been through?
me tears in my eyes: yes get dana, and also me bc im reading this
The stronger you feel, the more alive you are, right?
[maybe that's the answer, maybe it's not. Itsuki's aware of how little he knows about Buzen, at the end of the day. Even with his feelings for him, he can't claim to know his mind. And that fct hurts.]
If he can leave even the smallest impact behind wherever he goes... Then that's proof of his existence.
points the glock at you, crying
[The smallest impact...yes. It almost feels like that, but at the same time, so little turned into so much. He was only here briefly, and yet he made a world of a difference.]
[She's shuddering, drawing closer.]
He deserved...more time. He deserved all the time in the world. I don't care what he said. It's not fair, Itsuki. It's not fair at all.
SLDMFSLF WE'RE JUST HURTING EACH OTHER NOW
it's just so sad. that buzen isn't here, and that Hot Pants, someone whose strength he's seen so many times, is crumbling for the sake of another. If Buzen was, then he'd know what to say.
But maybe that's also the problem -- that Buzen always knows what to say, and now they're left bereft without him.]
Yeah. [he puts all his agreement in that single word,] I wish he was still here -- with us, and not just as a thought in our heads. It's hard to yell at someone in your head, yeah?