...There's something that happened before that. Right after you jumped in my arms, I hugged you. And when I hugged you -- your expression, tone, and your voice changed. It felt like you were a completely different person. Whoever you were, that person was angry and hated me.
Then you kissed me, [he can't hide the kiss from her when it's clearly a trigger for her/??] and you threw up right after.
I'm going to assume that was "Wicked", the person I was in the past. I had spoken to Steel-san about my concern about her possibly effecting me due to those memories returning.
[she's so cute when she's embarrassed.... perhaps all this trauma today was worth it, including the discovery that the girl who made out with him and dommed him was indeed, Marie's Past Self.
I’m beginning to think it’s related to how people treat me.
[ A slight pause. ]
With kindness, I can feel it — like suddenly I’m going to be sick. And there was a time that Damien had asked about my body in the real world, if someone was taking care of it.
I do know for a fact that she does hate affection, so…
Well, we both know that everyone here won't just leave you alone, or treat you badly.
[he remembers the 3 glasses of water, and more importantly, he remembers the number of people who thanked him for what he did, as if traumatizing Marie was a good thing,]
Then let me help you, okay? You can help me out too. [will this make it worse for her?
he doesn't want to make it worse for her. he doesn't want her to be sad, even though it's not up to him -- even though it's so much more than just this. His usual move would be get up and hold her hand, but he keeps his back on the chair.]
Do you think Wicked will talk to me if she shows up again?
Of course. I care about you, and I don't want this relationship to be focused on just helping me. If there's something that you're going though then I'd hope that you'd come to me.
[ Which may seem hypocritical -- wanting to keep him away but also keep him close, enough that he'd be able to rely on her. It's that piece of her that's fearful of the possibility of death and wanting to desperately hold onto the idea that maybe, just maybe, she and her friends can find a way to keep her alive. ]
[Hearing Marie state that resolutely is... Well, it's nice. Itsuki's more of a giver, and he always lets people take. There's something charming about how emphatic she is that he rely on her too, especially since he's been bothering her since they first met. Marie, softe...
He tries not to look too happy, and it helps that she asks the next question.]
I wouldn't mind. [WANT is a very STRONG WORD, but also, he doesn't feel repelled. (it's called simping)] I'd like to find some way where she doesn't have to come out at all, but... If it might happen, then there's no harm in being prepared, right?
[he says that more tentatively, since, after all! this is! marie! and she'd know herself best, wouldn't she]
[ PLEASE STOP SIMPING FOR THE CANON SOCIOPATH LITERALLY IT'S ON HER WIKI!!! ]
I'm just afraid she may hurt you. I've heard her voice before, back when my memories had first returned, and I remember her saying that she'd rather kill everyone to avoid being pitied.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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...There's something that happened before that. Right after you jumped in my arms, I hugged you. And when I hugged you -- your expression, tone, and your voice changed. It felt like you were a completely different person. Whoever you were, that person was angry and hated me.
Then you kissed me, [he can't hide the kiss from her when it's clearly a trigger for her/??] and you threw up right after.
1/3
[ ???? WHAT THE FUCK ]
You should have pushed me off!
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[ Not her always throwing up. God. ]
I'm going to assume that was "Wicked", the person I was in the past. I had spoken to Steel-san about my concern about her possibly effecting me due to those memories returning.
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at that he sits up straight, clearly interested.]
What did Steel-san say?
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They said that they'll try to help but...
I honestly don't know what we could do.
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[ A slight pause. ]
With kindness, I can feel it — like suddenly I’m going to be sick. And there was a time that Damien had asked about my body in the real world, if someone was taking care of it.
I do know for a fact that she does hate affection, so…
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Well, we both know that everyone here won't just leave you alone, or treat you badly.
[he remembers the 3 glasses of water, and more importantly, he remembers the number of people who thanked him for what he did, as if traumatizing Marie was a good thing,]
Regardless of what happened today.
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… I just… hope that I don’t hurt anyone.
And I hope that I can stop being an inconvenience for you, as well.
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Hey, you promised me remember?
[THE PROMISE ITSUKI DIDN'T MENTION]
We made a deal, so I'm doing my part to keep it. I do want to think of something that won't make you sick though.
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I promised, but you didn’t really explain what that promise was…
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It's a promise to respect each other's decisions!
[he thinks he's sooo slick,]
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some of his 'kawink' vibes fade a little though, as he looks back at her]
To hang out with you and talk to you, and be there if you need me.
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[ Okay she kind of suspected that. ]
I do think of you as a friend, Kagami-san, but...
[ She doesn't even want to finish the thought. ]
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Then let me help you, okay? You can help me out too. [will this make it worse for her?
he doesn't want to make it worse for her. he doesn't want her to be sad, even though it's not up to him -- even though it's so much more than just this. His usual move would be get up and hold her hand, but he keeps his back on the chair.]
Do you think Wicked will talk to me if she shows up again?
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[ Which may seem hypocritical -- wanting to keep him away but also keep him close, enough that he'd be able to rely on her. It's that piece of her that's fearful of the possibility of death and wanting to desperately hold onto the idea that maybe, just maybe, she and her friends can find a way to keep her alive. ]
... You want to speak to her?
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He tries not to look too happy, and it helps that she asks the next question.]
I wouldn't mind. [WANT is a very STRONG WORD, but also, he doesn't feel repelled. (it's called simping)] I'd like to find some way where she doesn't have to come out at all, but... If it might happen, then there's no harm in being prepared, right?
[he says that more tentatively, since, after all! this is! marie! and she'd know herself best, wouldn't she]
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I'm just afraid she may hurt you. I've heard her voice before, back when my memories had first returned, and I remember her saying that she'd rather kill everyone to avoid being pitied.
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Itsuki considers that.]
So... it'll be fine as long as I don't pity her, right? I can do that.
[itsuki can be a mean girls slut, he just hasn't been because he's been on his best behavior]
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It might. I’m not entirely sure. These are all just memories of her life that I’m being shown, after all.
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...We're gonna have to know more about her if she might show up again. [itsuki u moron] What if we did it in a safer place?
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And maybe where I don't have my gun, and any sharp objects are hidden away.
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[wicked kills itsuki with a mlp figurine]
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